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"Old" people jokes 2/25/2005 An elderly Floridian called 911 on her cell phone to report that her car has been broken into. She is hysterical as she explains her situation to the dispatcher: "They've stolen the stereo, t 0 Comments, 274 Views, 0 Votes | |
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The 'engineer' and the blondes 2/25/2005 A group of blondes in a class at New Mexico State University were given the assignment to measure the height of a flagpole. So they went out to the flagpole with ladders and tape measures, and 0 Comments, 210 Views, 0 Votes | |
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A Bottle Of Wine 2/25/2005 For all of us who are married, were married, wish you were married, wish you weren't married... Something to smile about the next time you open a bottle of wine. <br> Sally was dri 0 Comments, 189 Views, 0 Votes | |
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"Dom Property Laws" 2/25/2005 1. If I like it, it is mine <br> 2. If it is in my hand, it is mine <br> 3. If I can take it from you, it is mine <br> 4. If I had it a little while ago, it is m 0 Comments, 137 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Halloween 2/25/2005 Two men were walking home after a Halloween party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery just for laughs. Right in the middle of the cemetery they were startled by a tap-tap-tapping no 0 Comments, 182 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Embarrassing moment 2/25/2005 Two dwarfs go into a bar, where they pick up a couple chicks and take them back to their hotel rooms. The first dwarf is bummed out cuz he is unable to get an erection. His depression is made worse 0 Comments, 158 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Things A REDNECK won't say 2/25/2005 Duct tape won't fix that. <br> We don't keep firearms in this house. <br> I'll have grapefruit instead of biscuits and gravy. <br> Be sure to bring my salad dressing 0 Comments, 87 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Halloween Costume 2/25/2005 A bald man with a wooden leg gets invited to a Halloween party. He doesn't know what costume to wear to hide his head and his leg so he writes to a costume company to explain his problem. A few 0 Comments, 95 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Old Army Men 2/25/2005 If I could, I'd enlist today and help my country track down those responsible for killing thousands of innocent people in New York City and Washington DC. <br> <br> But, I'm ov 0 Comments, 92 Views, 0 Votes | |
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21 Steps 2/25/2005 ((Important Notice... If you lack a sense of humor or the ability to have an open mind, please click your back button and continue on, this is not for you)) <br> 21 STEP PROGRAM TO BECOM 0 Comments, 176 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Is God Really A Man? 2/25/2005 I have my doubts. If he were... <br> Any fake phone number a girl gave you would automatically forward your call to her real number. <br> Nodding and looking at your watch wo 0 Comments, 92 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Don't "Mess" with the BIRD 2/25/2005 Mrs. Davidson's dishwasher quits working so she calls a repairman. Since she has to go to work the next day, she tells him, "I'll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the bil 0 Comments, 205 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Sex with a Nun 2/25/2005 A hippie gets onto a bus and sits next to a nun in the front seat. The hippie looks over and asks the nun if she would have sex with him. The nun, surprised by the question, politely declines and g 0 Comments, 277 Views, 0 Votes | |
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As i say goodnight.... 2/25/2005 We at Carnival Cruise Lines: didn't forget that a lot of entertainers had promised to leave the country if George W.Bush were to be re-elected President. <br> With that in mind, we have 0 Comments, 151 Views, 0 Votes | |
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things All Texans Know 2/25/2005 Armadillos sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the <br> air. <br> Roadrunners don't say "Beep Beep." <br> There are 5, 000 types of snakes and 4, 0 Comments, 114 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Forest Gump In Heaven 2/25/2005 The day finally arrived; Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven. He is at the Pearly Gates, met by St. Peter himself. However, the gates are closed and Forrest approaches the Gatekeeper. St. Peter sa 0 Comments, 130 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Thoughts On Marriage 2/25/2005 Marriages are made in heaven. But so again, are thunder and lightning. <br> When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing; either the car or the wife is 0 Comments, 74 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Will Rogers 2/25/2005 Will Rogers, who died in a plane crash with Wylie Post in 1935, was probably the greatest political sage this country has ever known. Enjoy the following: <br> 1. Never slap a man who's 0 Comments, 108 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Clues A Woman Should Call It A Night 2/25/2005 1. I have absolutely no idea where my purse is. <br> 2. I believe that dancing with my arms overhead and wiggling my butt while yelling WOO-HOO is truly the sexiest dance move around. 0 Comments, 97 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Campers 2/25/2005 Two men camping in the mountains had spent four days together, and they were getting a little testy. <br> <br> One morning, the first friend says, "You know, we're starting to 0 Comments, 130 Views, 0 Votes | |
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"Country" wisdom 2/25/2005 Don't name a pig you plan to eat. <br> Country fences need to be high, pig tight, and bull strong. <br> Life is not about how fast you run, or how high you climb, but how we 0 Comments, 84 Views, 0 Votes | |
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making a marriage last 2/25/2005 My wife and I have the secret to making a marriage last: <br> 1. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little wine, some good food and companionship. She goes Tuesdays, I 0 Comments, 144 Views, 0 Votes | |
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husband and vet 2/25/2005 One hot July day we found an old straggly cat at our door. She was a sorry sight. Starving, dirty, smelled terrible, skinny and hair all matted down. We felt sorry for her and put her in a carrie 0 Comments, 134 Views, 0 Votes | |
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What is a dom supposed to look like? 2/24/2005 Hello BDSM'ers, <br> Lately I have noticed that my subbie is embarrassed by my appearance. Earlier this evening I screamed "kneel, bitch!" and she sort of squinted her eyes as if looking 0 Comments, 56 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Out of the closet! 2/24/2005 Oh I am having such major issues right now. Please help me, internet people! <br> I had been fantasizing about torturing my subbie with noise so I tried to think of the most irritating s 0 Comments, 40 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Mayhem in the trailer park 2/24/2005 My subbies are really mad at me. How can I make things better? <br> Let me start by saying that I am active in my local Freecycle group. For those who don't know, Freecycle is a "virtual 0 Comments, 45 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Grooming Your Dominate 2/24/2005 As usual, I've got a crisis in my personal life and the only recourse is to air my baggage on a public forum. <br> Due to her superb cocksucking skills, original subbie has earned the p 0 Comments, 36 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Weird subbie? 2/24/2005 Please help me, people! <br> Recently I rescued a stray subbie and I am having a dickens of a time getting her re-acclimated to reality. She had been hanging out in #gorean and picked u 0 Comments, 30 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Avon Calling. . . . .. . 2/24/2005 An Avon lady was alone in an elevator when suddenly she had to fart. <br> She promptly reached into her bag and sprayed the air with an Avon Pine Scented deodorizer. <br> Tw 0 Comments, 113 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Tickle Me Elmo 2/24/2005 Tickle me Elmo > > A new employee is hired at the Tickle Me Elmo factory, to report to work promptly at 8:00 AM. The next day at 8:45 AM, there's a knock at the personnel manager's door 0 Comments, 52 Views, 0 Votes |
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ConnexionSM is a service mark of Streamray Inc. and used with permission.
Disclaimer: This website contains adult material, all members and persons appearing on this site have contractually represented to us that they are 18 years of age or older.
